I read this article this morning and I felt that I just had to share my thoughts on it...
We have so many friends who we used to hang out with before we all had children and we love them - They are cool people - But once we all had children our different parenting styles emerged and many people do not teach their children how to behave...They just take the easy way out & try to look the other way at inappropriate behavior stating "kids will be kids" or something like that...& now we don't hang out with as many of those friends as we used to because of the way their children behave - Not only is it annoying, it is not a good example for our children...
As parents (whether we homeschool or not~besides, don't we all as parents actually homeschool our children right from the start?) Anyway, as parents we are our children's first teachers of morality and ethics (among other things like manners, hygeine, etc)...of what is acceptable behavior in society...it is our job to teach them right and wrong so that they grow up to be productive members in society...I am just tired of so many parents today who are actually afraid of their children...Afraid to tell them "No" - Afraid to make them a little bit upset...Afraid that their children won't like them anymore or whatever it is that makes these parents act the way that they do! Maybe a lot of these parents act this way out of guilt because both parents work and are away from the children for many hours in a day...
I just want to encourage those of us "Rebels with a Cause" who have the strength and desire to set a standard of behavior for their children and hold them accountable to it. It is definitely not an easy road to walk down...It takes a lot of persistence and energy because consistency is the key, but the rewards are great!
Here's one example I remember...when my daughter Becky was about one year old and decided that she wanted to play in the dog food every time she had a chance. It would have been really easy for me to just remove the dog food bowl everyday and alter my way of life that existed in our home before she entered into our family...but my husband and I realized that we were a family before we even had children and that each child we gave birth to has to fit into our already existing family. Anyway, instead of catering to Rebecca's whims (they start early with their demands, don't they?) we had to teach her that it was not acceptable for her to play in the dog food. After repeatedly telling her "No, no" and moving her away from the bowl (which felt to me like 1,000 times a day) I had so much joy and pride in my efforts when she finally crawled towards the dog food bowl, paused for a moment, looked at me & then at the bowl and then back at me again & then continued onto some other area...VICTORY! It's worth it!!
I also remember the time when our son Matthew was a toddler (between 1 & 2 years old) - He was our active child (actually, he still is, but I digress) - Anyway, at every meal we would put him in the high chair to feed him and he decided he wanted to stand up! Well, that is not acceptable in our house - Dan & I don't stand on our chairs during meals so why should our children? This is just how we look at things in our house - Call us crazy! I would physically have to pick him up & reposition him back into the high chair continuously during the whole meal - (All children will test the limits and try to get their way - It's human nature - I would worry about my children if they didn't do this) But we just refused to cater to this desire of his not to sit down in the high chair. I have many friends whose children did the same thing and they actually allowed it (I guess because it does get tiresome to be consistent with your requirements) I actually watched them as they continued to feed their children in their highchair while the child stood up, danced around, threw food on the floor, etc. & the parents just accepted it. It baffles me how these intelligent adults can be lead around on a string by a child!
Of course we all have to make some concessions - Like right now Jake is emptying the entire contents of my tupperware cabinet and playing with it all over my kitchen floor, but I wanted to actually write a blog entry with semi-coherent thoughts today, so now I have to go clean - At least he wasn't sitting on my lap slapping me in my face the whole time because he was angry at me because his desire was for me to entertain him and I wasn't! Anyway, I copied this article written by Lori Borgman that I received from Crosswalk to share with you all.
Parents: The First Teachers of Morality and Ethics Lori Borgman, Contributing Writer
With small children being arrested and handcuffed at public schools -- a little girl in Florida and a little boy in Wisconsin -- kindergarten round-ups may be substantially altered. "Children, this is the craft center where we cut and paste. This is the reading center where we look at books, and this is the holding room where you will stay if you go berserk, your parents refuse to come and we are forced to call the police." So long naps, snacks and story time. Read them the Miranda in terms a 6-year-old can understand. It is a tail-wagging-the-dog state of affairs when 45-pound tyrants punch, hit, slap, kick and are able to hold adults as virtual hostages. But why wouldn't the little darlings be able to do such things? The schools' hands are tied, which is not wholly unlike being cuffed. As aggressive as many teachers can get these days is to kneel down and say, "We're going to put the toys away now. Please pick up the toys. You don't want to pick up the toys? Well, it's time to pick up the toys." That is one "please" and two rounds of cajoling too many. Super Nanny and the ladies with British accents and woolen capes from Nanny 911 are at times prone to employ similar tactics. "Are you angry? Why are you angry?" "You want to say bad words? Here, go into the bathroom and say your bad words into this square of monogrammed toilet tissue."
The emphasis is on what we want and how we feel, as opposed to whether our behavior meets minimum competency requirements. It is no longer, "Did you do the right thing or the wrong thing?" but "How do you feel about the thing you did?" We no longer ask, "Was that a bad thing to do, or a good thing to do?" We ask, "What did you feel when you cursed your classmate, heaved the brick and spat on the teacher?" Feelings have trumped standards. Feelings are not bad things; it is good to feel loved, to feel wanted and to feel valued. But feelings are inadequate to fuel the engine that drives the train. Feelings can be self-centered, deceptive and malleable. The self-esteem movement was based on feelings and it turned out to be a shortcut to the reflecting pool of narcissism. The best thing a parent can do in a culture where feelings trump principles is refuse to play along. You don't need to roll up the sleeve of your T-shirt and tuck a pack of smokes in it, but do think of yourself as a rebel -- a rebel with a cause. Lovingly teach your child that there is most definitely right and wrong. For thousands of years this has been the role of the Judeo-Christian ethic, to provide an objective benchmark for behavior. Teach your children that there is acceptable behavior and unacceptable behavior, appropriate speech and inappropriate speech. Teach your children that feelings do not trump standards; self-control was meant to trump feelings.
In his farewell address from the oval office, Ronald Reagan said, "All great change in America begins at the dinner table." If we are to recapture a common denominator of right and wrong, it will begin in homes with conversations between moms and dads and growing children. If you have never thought of yourself as a teacher of morality and ethics before, now is a wonderful time to begin.
He got a lot of nice presents from everyone & has been enjoying playing with all of them everyday! Becky & Matthew are so good & they love to play along with him...
I made a cake to look like the Candyland game board using Starburst candies for the squares...YUM!
Here is a picture of my baby niece sitting on my couch under the giant candycanes I constructed to help decorate my living room and turn it into Peppermint Forest... 
He got a lot of nice presents from everyone & has been enjoying playing with all of them everyday! Becky & Matthew are so good & they love to play along with him...
I made a cake to look like the Candyland game board using Starburst candies for the squares...YUM!
Here is a picture of my baby niece sitting on my couch under the giant candycanes I constructed to help decorate my living room and turn it into Peppermint Forest... 
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9 months old...
